Sunday, June 17, 2018

Open letter to Phil Mickelson (my 2018 U.S. Open champ)


Opinion by William Wilczewski

Dear “Lefty:”
From the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU!
With one (rule-breaking) stroke of your putter on Saturday, you’ve brought the game of golf back to the common man.
Sure, in many circles you’re being trashed more than a discarded Twinkie wrapper, but — to me — your move on the 13th green that fateful day at the U.S. Open at Shinnecock Hills in Southampton, N.Y., has given all us normal duffers piece of mind.
Like many of us, your bogey putt sailed passed the cup like it was on rails.
Like many of our balls, that damn Duracell Bunny kept going and going … and going!
Like many of us, you picked up your pace to a fast jog (okay, maybe it was more like a Usain Bolt sprint) and caught up to it like Rosanne Barr catching up to a lost Twinkie. Then — while it was still moving, no less — you tried to poke it back into the cup, which — sadly — didn’t work either.
All said and done, which included a 2-stroke penalty, you ended the hole with a snowman holding a couple beers (or a 10 for all you non-golfers).
Yes, people have likened it to a John Daly-esque meltdown, but to all us Average Joes, that’s not such a bad thing.
To all us Average Joes, having something we’ve done on the links being compared to a movie hybrid of Happy Gilmore and Slapshot is a good thing.
Welcome to the club!
Secret handshake details to come …
Anyway, at the end of the day, many say this may have been the worst hole of golf since Happy and Bob Barker mixed it up on their fateful day.
To us common men, though, it was just another frustrating hole during another frustrating round on yet another frustrating Saturday for yet another common man.
One just like us.
Well, accept for the $27,952.00 you made for a four-day, tied-for-48th-place, +16-effort.
Ok, looking at it that way, maybe you’re not exactly a common man, but at least Daly has another member in his club.
You’re going to have to get with him about the secret handshake for that one …
 (Wilczewski can be reached at wilczewskiwilliam@hotmail.com.)

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