Ready to rumble? Three-time state champ called out; to grapple today!

Opinion by William Wilczewski

I got an anonymous phone call not too long ago, so I’ve turned into a promoter, of sorts.

The call came from the remote wilderness of Ckeektowarsaw, Poland.

Thank goodness for cell phones, huh?

Anyway, the raspy voice on the other end had heard about Rio Rico High (Ariz.) three-time state wrestling champion Marky Lopez.

Thank goodness for the Nogales International Web site, huh? (Go to: http://www.nogalesinternational.com/sports/.)

Anyway, although the man behind the raspy voice wouldn’t tell me his name, he had a massive challenge in mind.

He said he only wrestled one season at Ckeektowarsaw High School, but he was interested in getting back on the mat—especially after watching Lucha Libre on TV Azteca—also online.

My first instinct was to contact Hawk wrestling skipper Brad Beach to see what he thought.

Brad’s first thought was clear: “If this guy has a passport—which one really needs around here—and if he doesn’t mind waiting three or four or more hours in line at the border … Why not? Let’s set up a title bout with Marky.”

I went on to tell Brad that this guy said he was in the Polish Marine Corps years ago, and hasn’t done much in the way of exercise in the last few, but Brad—a Devil Dog, jarhead himself—still thought the guy behind the raspy voice might still give Marky a run for his money—and if not, it sure might provide a good laugh or two or three.

So, on Thursday, the “Champ vs. Chump” Intergalactic Title Bout was set up for today at 3 p.m., at the Rio Rico High Wrestling Room (a.k.a., The Microwave).

The man behind the raspy voice said this was perfect.

“It will give Marky time to get his good final rest—if he can, thinking about what’s lurking in the wings for him,” the mystery man said, “then start his week off badly.

“I would have done it on Monday, but that’s my deadline day,” he added, explaining that he worked as Sports Editor of the Ckeektowarsaw Daily Herald back home.

(Insert smoking cough here!)

With the man’s cough, I quickly deduced that he had that nasty smoking habit, so I asked?

“You a smoker?”

“For sure,” he replied, “but that’s part of my training. I do 12-ounce (Coca-Cola) curls and (how-much-does-a-cig-weigh?) curls as much as I can to get ready for big matches.

Because his training was much like pugilist Ricardo Mayorga, I quickly deduced that the guy behind the raspy voice was a boxing fan, so I asked.

“You like the sweet science?”

“Of course! Who doesn’t?” was his reply.

I had to agree—and think, wow, this guy and me have a lot in common. I hope he doesn’t get hurt because Marky’s pretty tough, but this guy sounded pretty rough himself, so hopefully it will be a good match.

The guy, though, went on to give me a warning: “Despite my pencil-neck-and-arms-and-legs, don’t underestimate me!” he exclaimed, “and tell Marky not too, either!”

Marky, if you’re reading, those were his exact words.

Anyway, when I finally sealed the promotional deal with Beach, I pulled him aside and asked him: “Honestly Brad, what do ya think is gonna happen here (today)?”

At the time, Brad said, “(Marky) has been training real hard, so (tell that guy to) be prepared.

“Semper fi (or always faithful),” though, is what Brad added into the mix, “(so) I got my money on (that guy).”

Okay, Marky, looks like you got a few people to prove wrong today at 3 p.m. in The Microwave.

Are you up for the challenge?